Tag Archives: Self-Care

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Self-Reiki When Grieving

Practicing Self-Reiki When You Are Grieving

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Practicing self-Reiki really helped me when I was grieving the deaths of my loved ones.  I truly believe it really helped to keep me in better health during those times . Do I have any way to scientifically prove it? Not really other than I felt calmer, slept better and didn’t get sick during those two very difficult periods in my life. Maybe that is proof enough self-Reiki worked for me.

SELF-REIKI AT HOME

So how did I do it? First of all, I got myself into a routine. Having a routine made it second nature. I didn’t have to make myself remember. It just happened. This makes it a no-brainer when you are grieving and can barely remember what day it is. I just made sure I practiced self-Reiki every morning when I was in the shower. It only took 5 – 10 minutes. I used one particular symbol and drew it in the air from my head to my feet. I then drew the symbol to cover my whole body. I finished up by giving thanks for the beautiful day ahead. Over time, it became a matter of habit. This helped me to start my days in a better place both emotionally and physically.

SELF-REIKI AT WORK

Once I got to work however, it became another story. I don’t know about you but it is really tough to work when you are grieving. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t concentrate. I felt like crying for no reason. I also seemed to be on a very short fuse. Most employers don’t give much bereavement time. In fact, if it’s a friend who has died, you really don’t get any bereavement time at all. So I went to work and tried to get through the day but the grief was always with me.

During those moments when it hit the hardest, I would go into my office and close the door. I would place my right hand over my heart and my left hand over my stomach. I would take a few deep breaths. I would send myself Reiki to stay calm and balanced. If I couldn’t escape completely, I would at least try to walk outside for 5 minutes. Just being in the fresh air can relax and rejuvenate you. Both of these techniques kept me from falling apart at work when I couldn’t get through the day.

Again, practicing self-Reiki didn’t take all my sadness away when I was grieving but it did help me find a place of peace within myself. This place of peace helped me to move forward on my grief journey one step-at-a-time.

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!


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Feeling Awful

Feeling Awful When Grieving

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Feeling awful when you are grieving is perfectly normal. Since every relationship is unique, how a person grieves is unique to that relationship. If feeling awful is your thing, then you are right on track. Other normal reactions can include everything from feeling numb to wanting to eat everything in sight to not wanting to eat at all.

I remember when my best friend died I felt like I was in a fog for days. I sat at work (I am still not sure how I got there) and just stared at the computer. I couldn’t sleep without thinking about her.  I couldn’t hear a song on the radio without crying. Even worse because she died by suicide, most people avoided me or wouldn’t talk to me at all. This resulting in me putting up walls and isolating myself even more. Eventually I just plastered on my “happy face” and told everyone I was “fine”.

MISINFORMATION

Now that I am a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist®, I realize my feelings were no different than what most grievers experience. Historically society has told us how we should or shouldn’t be feeling after any loss. It got passed down from generation to generation. As a result, well-meaning friends and relatives say things like “They are in a better place” or “Eat some more ice cream and you’ll feel better” after a death of someone close to you. Maybe some of you have even heard after the break-up of a relationship “We never liked them anyway” or “It’s ok, it just wasn’t meant to be”.

The problem is we are taught to intellectualize grief when really it is really a matter of the heart. Since most people aren’t given the necessary “heart tools” – especially when it comes to loss – they do the best they can by giving us feedback they think our heads will understand.

TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY

In addition to our hearts needing tender-loving-care while we are grieving, so do our bodies. A body needs energy to be healthy. Grief is an energy-depleting emotion. If you aren’t replacing and/or balancing its energy you feel awful. For example, after the death of my former finance, my heart physically ached inside my body. It felt like it was going to explode out of my chest. It felt like I was having a heart attack. Maybe in some way – figuratively not literally – I was. My stomach felt like I had swallowed a block of concrete. I had zip, nada, no energy.

Since we have been conditioned not to express our feelings, we bottle them all up inside. We walk around like robots. We hold back the tears. We hide from friends and family. Eventually our bodies can’t take it anymore. We explode inside like metal in a microwave. As a result, it’s not unusual to get sick by not dealing with grief. This outcome is so much worse than just feeling what you were feeling from the beginning.

REIKI HELPED

One suggestion for preventing your grief manifesting in a physical way is to find practices that help you balance the energy in your body – Reiki, Yoga, Tai Chi or Qigong. After the deaths of both of my friends, I found that Reiki really helped me. It kept me more peaceful and relaxed. Much better for my well-being than eating gallons of ice cream or exploding in a meeting.

The bottom line is to understand and express what you are feeling both emotionally and physically.  It is normal and natural and most importantly – it is just right for you. Be sad. Be numb. Be tired. Communicate how you feel – even if you do feel awful. You heart and your body will thank you.

Grief is one instance where knowing you are feeling awful is actually a good thing.

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!


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Emotional Benefits of Reiki

Emotional Benefits of Reiki When Grieving

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Grief affects us emotionally in many different ways. These effects range from feelings of anger, fear and worry to harboring resentment and blame. As a result, your emotional energy centers can become blocked or unbalanced and you feel completely out sorts. It is difficult to begin your grief journey when you are feeling this way. Reiki has the ability to provide you with emotional benefits during grieving. This happens because Reiki unblocks and balances your emotional centers. After receiving Reiki, you feel more calm and relaxed. This helps you to better handle the emotions associated with your grief.

EMOTIONAL BENEFITS 

Following are the emotional benefits of Reiki when you are grieving.

Promotes Feelings of Calmness

Grief can send your world into a tailspin. Reiki helps to promote feelings of calmness by balancing your first chakra which helps you to be more grounded. Being grounded fills you with a sense of stability which leads to feeling emotionally calm.

Relieves Stress by Relaxing the Mind

Grief can overwhelm your mind in many ways. This can include the inability to make decisions, feeling confused or experiencing a sense of numbness. Reiki can relax the mind by unblocking your Third and Fifth Chakras to remove any indecisiveness you may be experiencing. It also minimizes confusion by balancing your sixth chakra. Relaxing the mind helps to relieve any grief-related emotional stress you may be experiencing.

Encourages Emotional Release

If not addressed, grief can build up inside of you sometimes to the point you feel like exploding or imploding. Reiki focuses on your sixth chakra to help you release any emotions you may be holding inside. It also helps your fourth Chakra bring your heart back to a place of love. Emotional release is especially healthy when you are grieving. This will allow you to experience healthy feelings of sadness.

Soothes Emotional Distress

Grieving can often make you feel hopeless and in a state of emotional upheaval. Everything can begin to irritate you. Reiki goes to your fourth Chakra to bring back a sense of hope and balances your Second Chakra to help remove any irritability. Having a sense of peace helps you to get through the emotional fallout associated with grief.

Removes Fear and Negativity

Grieving often brings forward feelings of fear. Many times this is because you have lost your sense of trust. By balancing your Seventh Chakra, Reiki reminds you to trust your inner voice. When you listen to your inner voice, you are less likely to be fearful and more likely to believe your future will turn out okay.

Promotes Creativity

Grief can shut you down. Finding ways to express your emotions, rather than hold them in, helps you to heal. Photography, writing, art, acting and singing are all ways to express your grief. Reiki can keep your fifth chakra in balance so you can use your creativity as a healthy part of your grief journey.

Provides Clarity of Thought

Grief often makes you feel confused and/or lose your concentration. As a result, you may be more prone to an accident when you are grieving. Reiki can remove any blockages in your sixth chakra to provide clarity of thought and improve your ability to concentrate.

Boosts Self-Esteem

You can become your own worst enemy when you are grieving. Feelings of guilt and self-criticism play over and over in your head. You being to lose any confidence you had in yourself as person. In this case, Reiki will focus on your third chakra to boost your self-esteem and give you a sense of confidence. Accepting yourself and what you are going through is healthy when you are grieving.

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Excerpt from Grief Reiki – An Integrated Approach to the Emotional, Physical and Spiritual Components of Grief and Loss, Chapter 7, Emotional Benefits of Reiki.

Now Available on AmazonKindle and Barnes and Noble.

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!

 


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