Category Archives: Grief

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What is Grief Recovery?

What is Grief Recovery?

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Recovery means different things to different people. Some people are upset by the word grief recovery. They think you can’t recover from loss because you will never be the same again. But the word “recovery” is not meant to suggest that you must “get over” your loss. Recovery in the context of grief recovery is about becoming emotionally complete and beginning the next phase of your life with a fresh perspective. Grief recovery is learning to heal your heart and not your head.

WHAT IS GRIEF RECOVERY?

The process of grief recovery could be described as taking action to deal with “unfinished business” so you don’t drag heartache throughout your life. It is taking a series of actionable steps to move beyond the pain associated with loss. Recovery is never about forgetting. It involves taking a guided inventory of all of the positive (and less than positive) elements of the loss and resolving those things you might have wished had been different, better or you had done more often. Doing this will allow you to enjoy fond memories, without regrets. It will also help you to look forward to the future, rather than worrying or being fearful about what it will bring.

Recovery means enhancing your life rather than limiting it. It is feeling better. It is having fond memories no longer turn painful. It is acquiring the skills you should have been taught as a child to deal with loss directly.

Recovery means experiencing the full range of normal human emotions from happiness to sadness and knowing these feelings are normal and natural.

Recovery means processing every feeling you experience as a result of your loss. This means no more walls going up around your heart or carrying emotional baggage from relationship-to-relationship.

Recovery means expressing your feelings regardless of the reaction you may get from those around you. This means not conforming to what society has told you about grief but being honest about how you are doing because that is what makes you human.

Recovery means having better relationships with those who are still living by always being “complete” with people so that you can have better relationships with them. This means delivering emotional communications better, differently or more often – usually before it is too late.

MOTIVATING FACTORS

What might be some of the motivating factors in wanting to know more about Grief Recovery?

First and probably more important, you may be suffering from a broken heart.

You may be at a point where you feel you desire a more fulfilling life.

You may be tired of experiencing pain, isolation and loneliness as a result of your loss.

You may feel like you lack the proper information to deal with your grief.

And finally, you may have found the courage and willingness to let go of what has been keeping you stuck in order to move through your grief.

WHEN IS GRIEF RECOVERY AVAILABLE?

This may sound like a cliche, but grief recovery is available anytime you are ready.

It is never too soon to heal your heart.

It can start after a new or previous loss.

It can help you to begin the process of healing.

It is a structured program that gives you the tools to recover from loss and have a fulfilling and joyful life.

If you want to learn more about how grief recovery can transform your life, sign up for our FREE one-hour initial consultation HERE.

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!

 


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Mediums

Mediums, Psychics and Psychic Mediums

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After my best friend’s death, I gravitated to learning more about mediums in an effort to better understand if she was okay. I had grown up Catholic and had been taught suicide was a mortal sin. If so, what did that mean for her? Was she “trapped” somewhere for the rest of eternity? Was she “locked out” of Heaven? I know it sounds silly but no one I knew had ever died by suicide. I hoped a Medium would help me to know if she was okay. Heck maybe even I would be able to get me a message directly from her.

Despite my eagerness, I proceeded with caution especially since I live in Los Angeles where people professing to be Mediums are on every street corner. First, I did my research on who was reputable and made a list. However, I chickened out and never made an appointment. I guess my fears (or maybe it was the cost) got the best of me. If you decide to go down the path of finding a Medium, make sure you thoroughly check them out first. Ask for referrals. The last thing you need when you are grieving is someone who takes advantage of your grief or ends up making you feel worse.

So now that I have brought up the “M” word, you may also be wondering about Psychics. Is there a difference between a Medium and a Psychic? And what is a Psychic Medium? It’s important you understand the distinctions. The differences between a Medium and a Psychic are:

MEDIUMS

Mediums communicate with the deceased or spirit world. They receive messages directly from spirit. They use their clair senses (see below) to interpret the information they receive.

PSYCHICS

Psychics see the past, present and future. It is said they “perceive” whereas a medium “receives.” Psychics often work with tarot cards, crystal balls, palmistry, astrological charts, tea leaves and runes.

And what is a psychic medium?

PSYCHIC MEDIUMS

Psychic Mediums use both psychic and medium abilities. They receive information from the spirit world then interpret the information using their psychic abilities.

Bottom line, if you want to know what is going on in your past, present or future, see a Psychic. If you want to communicate with someone who has died, a Medium or Psychic Medium would be your choice. I have never had a personal reading from a Psychic or Psychic Medium, although I have been to a Medium. The reading I received from the Medium brought me a great sense of peace.

My advice to you is if you decide to get a reading from either a Medium or Psychic Medium, don’t have high expectations about getting a message. There is a very good chance that your loved one may not come through. This could lead to disappointment and more sadness.

Just be open to whatever happens!

RESOURCES

Here is a list of well-known Mediums and Psychic Mediums  you may want to check out:

George Anderson                                    www.georgeanderson.com

Sylvia Browne                                          www.sylviabrowne.com

Theresa Caputo                                       www.theresacaputo.com

Chip Coffey                                              www.chipcoffey.com

John Edward                                           www.johnedward.net

Tyler Henry                                             www.tylerhenryhollywoodmedium.com

John Holland                                          www.johnholland.com

Colby Psychic Rebel                              www.psychicrebel.com

Monica Ten-Kate                                   www.monicathemedium.com

James Van Praagh                                 www.vanpraagh.com

Lisa Williams                                          www.lisawilliams.com

Thomas John                                         www.mediumthomas.com

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!


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Grief Journal

How a Grief Journal Can Help

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For me, journaling has always been one of the ways I get the thoughts out of the vastness of my head. I am the kind of person who thinks about everything. But the problem is all those thoughts swirl around in my head constantly. Even when I am sleeping. To the point I used to keep a pad of paper by the bed so I could wake up and write thoughts down so I wouldn’t forget them. This is no way to live. So many years ago I took up journaling. I did this for two reasons. The first reason was to get all these thoughts out of my head and onto paper. Once they got onto paper my head didn’t swirl as much. The second was that it allowed me to speak my truth. I found if I wrote my thoughts down in my journal first, I had a better chance of saying what I needed to say later. As a result, my communication skills improved.

So when my best friend died and the grief hit me, the swirl in my head started. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t focus. I had so many questions. I started analyzing everything I had done (or hadn’t done) and said (or hadn’t said). This started to drive me crazy. No one wanted to talk to me about her suicide so I felt alone and isolated. I grabbed my journal and used it to sort things out. It became my “grief journal” and surprisingly it really helped. It opened up the door to my emotions. It let me talk about the things I couldn’t talk about with anyone else. It also let me talk to my best friend.

REASONS TO START A GRIEF JOURNAL

Here are some of the reasons to start a grief journal:

Gets It Out. Keeping everything inside when you are grieving is tough. But sometimes you are forced to do this since other people aren’t prepared to deal with your sadness. Consequently, these feeling end up with nowhere to go. Getting them out of your head and down on paper can provide you with great relief. Writing in a grief journal gives you the opportunity to write about how you are feeling the moment you feel it. This is a big improvement over carrying it around in your head for days or weeks or maybe even years at a time.

You Can Be Honest. As humans we all have the need for approval. Sometimes this becomes especially true when you are grieving. As a result, you become less than honest about how you are really doing. You say things like “I’m doing fine” or “I’m so much better” just so you won’t be judged, criticized or analyzed by others. Writing your honest thoughts about how you are really doing in your grief journal keeps it real and does you a world of good.

Relieves Stress. Grief and stress seem to go hand in hand. There is so much going on after your loved one dies. Maybe you have to pull together a memorial service, attend financial meetings with lawyers or maybe you even have to pack up and move to another location. Stress is everywhere. And because grief may be causing you not to sleep, take good care of yourself, focus and concentrate, your stress is magnified one thousand fold. Even the little things throughout the day can become stressful for you. Writing in your grief journal can be a way for you to find relief from stress.

Improves Your Focus. Focus? What focus? I am grieving, for heaven’s sake! On a day-to-day basis everything is competing for your attention, but when grieving your attention is elsewhere. It may not even be on this earth. It may be on your loved one. Writing down lists of things you need to do in your grief journal can help find a way to keep your focus.

Provides Comfort. Writing down things that have helped you through your grief is very helpful. This can be things you read, things people said to you, etc. Reading through what has helped you on your journey (especially on days when you forget) can provide you with a sense of comfort.

It is important to never force yourself to write. If all you can do is a few minutes here and there, then that’s all you should do. Over time you will find that the words and thoughts may just pour out.

MEDITATION: HELP WITH JOURNALING

Please help me to express how I am feeling in my grief journal.

It’s been hard to find people who will listen to my grief and journaling helps me let go of these emotions.

Guide me and inspire to say what I need to say so I can move forward on my grief journey.

And so it is.

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Sending you love, comfort and peace!


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